Can Comparison Ruin Your Time with God?

by Debbie Wilson @DebbieWWilson

“What did you want to be when you grew up?” our small group leader asked. One by one, people offered sensible vocations. “From the time I was a boy, I wanted to be an eye doctor,” my optometrist said.

“I wanted to be a preacher and pound the pulpit,” a Christian worker chuckled. 

The leader turned to me. Unlike the rest of the group, I couldn’t recall one serious aspiration and couldn’t bring myself to admit I’d wanted to fly like Peter Pan or ride horses and catch bad guys like Annie Oakley.

My second-grade teacher once wrote on my report card, “Debbie does good work but daydreams too much.” Didn’t all children carry fairies to school? Little did I realize these were clues as to how I would someday connect with God.

Do you feel like your relationship with God should look a certain way? Do you compare yourself with other people and berate yourself for not being like them? The Psalmist wrote, “Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! It is amazing to think about. Your workmanship is marvelous—and how well I know it” (Psalm 139:14 TLB).

God made us multifaceted and different from each other. He didn’t create a bunch of sock dolls from the same ball of yarn. He knit you together in the perfect way to reflect His glory and display His creativity. If no two fingerprints are the same, why would we think God expects everyone to relate to Him the same way?

When my children were babies, our church had a place for nursing mothers to feed their infants. While chatting with another nursing mom, I mentioned the quiet time I spend with God at night. She straightened her shoulders, and huffed, “We are children of the light.”

If it is supposed to be darkest before dawn, I wondered why she boasted about meeting with God then! Maybe she’d never read God neither slumbers nor sleeps. Seriously, this woman’s rigid perspective showed in her countenance and outlook on life.

That’s why I appreciate hearing women from different ages and stages of life share how they connect with God.

One young mother and pastor’s wife, who grew up dancing, said music speaks to her. Today she uses music to direct her thoughts to God.

A busy working mom listens to a Bible app while she rides her stationary bike before dashing off to work. She uses car rides to share devotions with her teens.

Another gal prays when she walks her dog.

One of my romantic friends views her quiet time as a date. She looks forward to spending time with the One who knows all about her and wants to share life with her.

Another friend, a busy CEO, wife, mother, and volunteer in many ministries, starts her day with a Bible study and a kale/jalapeño smoothie! If she has to catch an early flight, she carries her devotional on the airplane.

An older widow sings hymns when the house grows dark.

For me, daydreaming contributes to my joy in studying and teaching the Bible. I like to put myself in the story and imagine how I’d have responded to those same circumstances. People in my audiences have told me those passages have come alive for them because of that perspective.

God tells us to delight in Him. That means spend time with the Lord in the way that draws you close to Him. Don’t be afraid to try different times of day and forms of Bible study. Just spend time with Jesus.

Take delight in the Lord. Psalm 37:4 NIV

This article is brought to you by the Advanced Writers and Speakers Association (AWSA).

Can Comparison Ruin Your Time with God? – encouragement from @DebbieWWilson on @AriseDailyDevo (Click to Tweet)

About the author: Drawing from her walk with Christ, and years as a Christian counselor, coach, and Bible teacher, Debbie W. Wilson helps women give themselves a break so they can enjoy fruitful and grace-filled lives. She is the author of Little Women, Big Godand Give Yourself a Break. Her latest book, Little Faith, Big God, was released in February 2020.

Little Faith, Big God: Grace to Grow When Your Faith Feels Small by [Wilson, Debbie]

She and her husband Larry founded and run Lighthouse Ministries, a nonprofit counseling, coaching, and Bible study ministry. She is an AWSA (Advanced Writers and Speakers Association) certified speaking and writing coach. Debbie enjoys a good mystery, dark chocolate, and the antics of her two standard poodles. Refresh your faith with free resources at

Join the conversation: What helps you connect with God?


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